I’m suddenly getting Facebook friends requests from people I went to high school with who were not only NOT my friends, they either picked on me constantly or ignored me completely. (In high school I was the skinny geeky fangirl book worm who wrote for the school newspaper. These days I’m pretty much the same, only I’m definitely not skinny and I’m writing for my corporate masters and the Internet.)
I’m conflicted about accepting these friends requests. If they didn’t want to be my friend then, why on Earth would they want to be my Facebook friend now?
But, on the other hand, I’ve already mingled friends from the various parts of my life (family, local friends, fandom friends, and professional acquaintances) on my Facebook account. And I’m very conservative about what I post.
Thoughts? Success stories? Tales of horror and woe?
ravenchilde_artJanuary 9, 2009 at 7:06pm
*snorts* I got a few of those from Myspace. People who barely talked to me back then trying to reconnect.
Not sure what they want?
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:10pm
Upon further investigation, it appears a couple of them have made lots of Facebook friends with whom they share their religious views. (I will NOT be drinking that Kool-Aide…)
ravenchilde_artJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:43pm
*chuckles* I’ve got a mixed bag, which is why I tend to not put up my more extreme religious viewpoints. Or, extreme viewpoints period. I just let people see the mild stuff. ^_~`
controubleJanuary 9, 2009 at 7:49pm
At least you can access your high school. My high school closed in 1980 and has been removed from the Facebook list since I got my account, so I can no longer use it to search for anyone. Probably just as well. I was the bookworm nerd in high school and since there is only one person from that time of my life I have kept up with anyway, I doubt I would even recognize most of their names any more.
If you don’t want them, don’t accept – I have only turned down one or two since I got my account, but they were from people I never heard of – might have been friends of friends – I have no idea.
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:10pm
I shall continue to ignore them…
fastfwdJanuary 9, 2009 at 8:27pm
If you really want to get up the noses of people who tormented you back in school, here is the absolute fool-proof method. It has been tested; it is guaranteed to work.
When someone like that contacts you, send this message: “I’m sorry, I don’t remember you. Where did we meet?”
And when they try to remind you, say, “I’m sorry, I really don’t remember that–it was so long ago. And I’m sorry but times being what they are, I’m only friending people I know personally. I hope you’ll understand. Best wishes.”
I’m So Evil.
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:11pm
I like your kind of evil. 😉
geekmomJanuary 10, 2009 at 4:19am
Yeah, I’ve had the same.
I think for the most part people in high school are too stuck in their own little world to think about how mean they are to other people and it honestly doesn’t occur to them that they were.
But outright cruel people? Block ’em.
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:12pm
I’ll just ignore them. They seem to have undergone an extreme religious conversion in the past 20-odd years…
petrini1January 10, 2009 at 5:23am
Hey, Goddess Girlfriend!
Some people really have changed since high school. At my 20th reunion, I saw the guy who was our class bully. My first encounter with him was when he slugged me because I spoke up when he cut in front of me in the lunch line. He was nasty and disagreeable as a teenager, and I avoided him at all costs. At the reunion, he sought me out to apologize for having always been such a jerk in high school. He seemed to have developed into a nice person.
That said, if they really tormented you and you’re still feeling rotten thoughts for them, you might pass on the friending. I passed without a second thought when it was a guy who screwed me over in a big way in college. But don’t necessarily discount the people you just didn’t have much contact with back then. I had a friend request from someone I barely remembered, who was not a friend in high school and whom I hadn’t thought about since then. We’ve ended up being pretty good Facebook pals.
Also, someone who was not your friend may have contact with people from school that you’ve lost track of and would love to get back in touch with.
I’d say it depends on the intensity of your current feelings toward them.
If it doesn’t work out, you can always un-friend them later.
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:13pm
I will continue to ignore them for now. It may be interesting to see who else pops up in the next few years as the 30th reunion draws near…
tardis1963January 10, 2009 at 5:28am
I only befriend people on Facebook who I have eaten a meal with and wouldn’t mind dining with again.
allisonsteinJanuary 13, 2009 at 11:14pm
That’s a reasonable policy.